May 28, 2013
Hail Mary Pass
We are going with the hail Mary pass. Meaning, after a long and basically sleepless night Tim and I feel that we can't yet decide to do the fontan procedure; not when there is still hope that the replacements of those two valves 'could' give him more time, he may not reject them, he may get five years out of them. His history isn't definitely an indicator of his future.Yes, we could be here again next year but what if we aren't? If we choose to do the Fontan and five years from now it fails and we have to do a heart transplant, possibly waiting longer than he would have for a new heart, how do we live with ourselves if we didn't give it one last try. If we are here again in a year then the fontan is still an option for us, but if we do the Fontan then there are no options left. We have left the door open for a convincing argument FOR the fontan, and are awaiting the opinion of a specialist who isn't back until Monday, but we have told our cardiologist that unless he has a strong opinion that makes a lot of sense to us then we will choose to go with the two new valves. Please, keep this in prayer.
A Pastor I know once said 'if you are trying to discern God's will, sometimes you need to make the choice and try to open the door and if the door doesn't open then you know to turn around and try the other door.' This is where we are today. We have chosen the door and on Monday we will find out if the door will open or not.
We spoke with Josh today, we didn't say much but we felt the need to tell him something because he's clearly more aware of what's going on then he has been in the past. Last night he was in my bed twice with nightmares and it tells us that he's anxious. We explained a little to him and told him to think about it today and if he had any questions we would talk to him again tonight. Pray we have the words, pray that God gives him the words he needs to express his fears and worries. We want what is best for Josh and part of that is mental well being, and peace.
Pray for our doctor as she speaks with this specialist on Monday, that they hear God's whispered advice and our questions are answered clearly.
Pray that this will work. That the hail Mary pass (the most important one in the history of us) will score us a touchdown.
Once again, thank you so much for all the love and support and prayers. We truly couldn't do this, make these choices, face these days, without knowing that you are all out there caring and praying. Our hearts have been so deeply touched.