November 21, 2010
The blessings in my life go un numbered...
Josh loves trains, so his Grandad set up a train set for him. Kaleb sat on my lap while we watched Josh and Grandad play with the trains, telling them to stop & go. Kaleb, wanting to join in the fun started yelling 'GO' and pointing his little 13 month old finger at Thomas. His talking is such an exciting thing for me since his brother is still not talking at three. I have never experienced this stage before, the part of life that lets you explore sounds and words to the joy and excitement of those around you. His first word was a few months ago when he said 'Ma Ma', he says Dog (dug), and attempts to say Josh but it never quite works. He's been doing those things for a while now, so this new stage of a new attempt at a word a day is so exciting. Yesterday he tried 'hello' when I gave him the cell phone, he said 'no' when I said no (although it didn't stop him from doing it, it just made him giggle). He is a light, a little gift that God knew we would need right now and he allows us to forget for a time that Josh is sick. I think he even allows Josh to forget sometimes. They play together and are getting much better at not beating each other up (let me rephrase - Josh is getting better at not beating up his little brother). I can see slowly how the bonds of friendship that will last their lifetimes are being built.
Kaleb will put his head on my shoulder, sucking his thumb and I can feel his little heart beat, feel his breath on my neck and nothing else matters. He is my sweet and sensitive one. If I fall, Josh laughs (which has a charm of it's own) but Kaleb, he cries and will put his head in my lap. If we say 'no' Josh goes ahead with it anyway and will put up with the consequences (almost as if he has pre-weighed the decision before attempting the actions), Kaleb gets a 'No' and he crumples and cries hard, even if that 'No' was meant for the dog or his brother. If something scares him he wants me, to hold him and ease the fear away, if he's sick he wants me to hold him until he feels better, if he hurts himself he needs kisses to make it better.
The differences between these two boys are polar and yet both are so wonderful. I have known joy, love and discovery in my life but nothing like I have known since meeting, and marrying Tim and ultimately having these two children. How blessed I am, how lucky I feel to have these three wonderful men brought into my life. (Not to mention of course my Father, who is and always will be my 'Daddy', the man I can run to for safety and comfort and unending love' )
Truly this woman is blessed! Even in the midst of my darkest night I cannot forget the men who have made my life so joyful and brilliant.