October 28, 2013

Who are you?


Who are you? Simple question right.

The answer is almost always what you do. 'I'm a mother, I'm a photographer', I'm a CHD advocate'...lawyer, doctor, teacher, nurse, pastor... fill in the occupation of your choice. However, that isn't what the question is asking really. I have been thinking about that all day. Who am I?

I am a woman who loves her family, I am strong but sometimes I am weak. I am funny but sometimes I am serious, I can love people but I have also been known to hurt people. I am rebellious but sometimes I follow the rules. I laugh and sometimes I cry. I am full of faith and sometimes I doubt. I am a maze of contradictions and yet somehow all of those contradictions make up the whole of me. I am not a static soul, forever the way I am today; I have changed since yesterday and tomorrow I will be someone slightly different from who I am today.

My job, my role, my interests are not who I AM, they are what I DO.

Thinking of those things leads me to think of my kids in the same manner. Sometimes they go through a phase I hate and I worry... 'is this tantrum filled, angry, rebellious, child the little version of the man he will become?' I have heard today a few people talk about what they want their kids to be when they grow up... a doctor, a lawyer, an engineer... (I personally had high hopes that one of my guys would be a Toronto maple Leaf). The reality is, that while I listened to these conversations I sat mulling over what I actually hope my boys will be. What will they answer one day when that question is posed to them. "who are you Joshua?" or "Who are you Kaleb?".

Here is what I hope they answer.

"I am a strong man, I defend the weak, I feel compassion, empathy, and love. I work hard to provide for my family, I am respectful, loving, faithful, and committed. I am full of laughter, though sometimes I am brave enough to cry. I believe, even through my doubts, I have loved and sometimes I have hurt but I have always known when an apology is necessary and I am humble enough to admit it. I am a child of God."


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